Me and my (non-identical) twin godsons
Having visited my godsons two Sundays in a row, I have come to the conclusion that I am definitely biased as a godma – the one on my left (John) is closer to my heart (pun fully intended). Also, if I were to have kids in future, I’ll stop at one, thank you very much.
Here are 5 things only the eldest kid in the family will understand. Based entirely on my experience as the eldest kid in my family and from my interaction with my twin godsons, of course:
(1) No matter whose fault it really is, it will be your fault. Always.
Even if you hit your younger sibling because he/she provoked you FIRST, you are at fault. Even if you did not initiate the fight, you did not “give in” to the tyranny of the younger one, so you are at fault. Period.
Once the younger one hollers / cries, you can prepare to be scolded / whacked. Resistance is futile and explanations are useless. Just suck it up. No one ever said life is fair.
(2) There is absolutely nothing you can do to win the affection of your parents back once you have a sibling.
Your mum used to sing you a lullaby before bedtime and cuddle you to sleep? Sorry, move over now. Your position as princess or prince has been usurped by this annoying fella called your sibling.
Even if you do extremely well in school and come home with your report card with perfect grades, nothing is going to change. You will just be lauded for setting a good example for the younger child. EVERYTHING is about the younger one.
One consolation is that the eldest kid usually has the “better” genes and is relatively smarter and more good-looking (though this point can be debated :D).
(3) Possibly the most annoying thing your parents can ever say to you is that they got you a sibling “because you looked lonely”.
How is it possible that being the king of the palace makes one lonely? Getting kicked off the throne and being replaced by this younger chap is what makes one truly feel lonely… and alone.
If parents would just admit they had an “accident”, or were tempted by a ‘baby bonus’ doled out by the government, or felt they had too much money and could definitely afford to have another baby, or wanted to have a second child as “insurance” if the elder one somehow got himself or herself killed, or they wanted to “try” for a child of another gender… ALL of these reasons would be way more acceptable.
If a child looks lonely, the child needs more of your attention and love… not another sibling. What gave you that idea?!
(4) Possibly the only good thing about being the eldest is to never have to wear hand-me-downs.
You will usually be given new clothes and shoes, unless your mother accepts items from a relative or neighbor or church friend. Your sibling(s) will wear your old clothes and shoes, play with your old toys and probably sleep in your old bed as well.
*Note: If you get a new toy and your sibling wants to snatch it from you, let the bugger have it. Do not try to resist or fight. Refer to Point 1.
(5) If you are smart enough, you can make your younger sibling your minion.
The younger one always tries to mimic what the elder one does, from the way you speak to the way you walk. And the younger child likes to get “approval” from the elder one.
Getting your sibling to fetch your toy or bag for you is not impossible. *wink*
Sure, it can be pretty annoying to have someone follow you everywhere you go, and mimic what you say, but it will make you feel rather important. 😀
I definitely treat the older boy, John, a lot better. At 22 months old, he is such a darling – so affectionate and he ‘clicks’ with me. However, it is easy to forget that he needs his parents’ love as much as his brother does. I am told that he cries when he has to sleep in his cot while his younger sibling gets to sleep in-between Daddy and Mummy on their bed. I feel it is grossly unfair. But what to do?
If I get to take one kid out to an amusement park in future, I’ll bring John. I’m biased too because it takes one “eldest child” to understand another. And this is what godmothers are for, methinks. 😀